Ever since I was a child I had a hard time getting to sleep at night. I remember my mom taking me to the pediatrician once when I was about 9 or 10 years old and asking them what I could do to help me get to sleep quicker. I would lay in bed at night, sometimes for hours, staring at the ceiling, or doing leg and arm exercises to hopefully tire my body. During college staying up late never seemed to be an issue because let's be honest, no good party started until 10:00pm at the earliest anyways :-)
While my issues with getting to sleep at night have pretty much diminished, I have run into a newer issue: staying asleep. To be honest, I can't remember a night where I haven't woken up at least once or twice (if not more) during the night in the last year. Of course there is the occasional bad dream (and I tend to dream A LOT) that abruptly wakes me, but many of the reasons I am up so much in the middle of the night are related to the diabetes.
Before I had the Continuous Glucose Monitor or the Insulin Pump, the only reasons I would be up in the middle of the night would be that I felt a low or high blood sugar. I would wake up feeling a little different, finally convince myself to get out of bed, turn on the light, and check my blood sugar. With low blood sugars I would have to find something to eat and wait the 15-20 minutes for my blood sugars to even out before I could get back to sleep. With a high blood sugar I would have to find some insulin, give myself an injection, and then I would have no issue getting back to bed because high blood sugars generally tend to make me sleepy anyways. At any rate, these episodes were often disruptive.
Within the last year though I have added the Continuous Glucose Monitor (CGM) and Insulin Pump to my life, that besides their numerous advantages, can sometimes cause even more disruptions to my sleep. The transmitter (little cell-phone like machine that tells me my blood sugars) for the CGM has to be within 5 feet of my body in order to get a reading. At night I usually put it on my nightstand or under my pillow. I have set it to beep at me if it goes higher or lower than certain blood sugar numbers. Sometimes the CGM will end up beeping at me, and in which case I will get up and correct a high or low blood sugar if needed. These disruptions seem to be happening less and less with the tighter control I have no with the insulin pump. Yay!
What I do notice myself doing though, that is almost comical now, is waking up naturally throughout the night at almost the same times during the night just to check the number on my CGM. My husband and I get in bed anywhere between 10:00 and 11:00 at night and I have a tendency to open my eyes around 12:30, 3:00, and 5:00 (give or take a half hour or so) each night just to adjust my body position and check my CGM. I appreciate the easiness of knowing my blood sugar right away but man oh man, what's a girl got to do around here to get a full night's sleep?? All joking aside, it's really not all that bothersome and probably just something I have naturally gotten used to. And something my husband has had to get used to as well. As a matter of fact, when he hears me stir in the middle of the night he's set on auto-pilot to ask "Are you okay?" and "How is your blood sugar?" Just another thing we all adjust to maintain the success of the diabetes.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
2 hour countdown
My Dad was in town this weekend, with my Uncle, cousin, and good family friend. Every year we have a little tradition of attending the Dirtbike Supercross in San Diego. Despite my Dad's best efforts to get me to ride a dirtbike when I was 12, it didn't really become something I wanted to do very often, but I can safely say that the males in my family are very much into it. Nonetheless, attending the Supercross with my Dad is a fun experience we share together each year.
Going to things like this, in addition to having a husband who grew up eating out for meals a lot, I am constantly faced with the fear of having to guess how many carbohydrates are in a polish dog or nachos or beer, for example, that I am about to consume. The guessing can get REALLY tricky sometimes, leaving me with approximately 2 hours of anxiety following these guessing games.
Before each meal, I follow the routine of checking my blood sugar, counting the number of carbs I am going to consume, entering the information into my insulin pump, and then the insulin gets delivered into my body. Let the countdown begin ... For me, insulin works for about 2 hours in my body, meaning that 2 hours after an injection I can check my blood sugar again to find out if I've injected too much, too little, or just enough insulin for any given meal. If my blood sugar is low after those two hours it means I injected too much. If my blood sugar is high, it means I injected too little. You get the point ....
Well, after 13 years I can pretty much guess what my blood sugars are going to be and what they will do during those 2 hours for the foods I commonly eat. I try to stick to a pretty regular diet because of this. But the anxiety really kicks in when I am left to guess how many carbs are in a meal I don't usually eat. Going to restaurants can be a nightmare sometimes.
Last night at the supercross I ordered a polish dog and agreed to have some of my husband's nachos. Recently I had a hot dog at costco and thanks so my handy-dandy iphone app (Calorie King) I knew there were 35 carbs in the hot dog bun there. The polish dog last night looked a little bigger, so I guessed 40 carbs for that one and 20 carbs for the nachos (about 2 carbs per chip, meaning I knew I could only have 10 chips). Boy does this get exhausting!
Blood sugar check. Counting carbs done. Enter the information into my insulin pump ... begin delivering bolus (that's the term for a one-time insulin injection). I eat and then I wait. 2 hours of holding my Dex, watching which way my blood sugars will turn. Will they go up? How fast will my blood sugar rise? Did I give too much insulin? Is my blood sugar going to plummet? Oh gosh, where are my sugar pills? Do I know where the closest medic station is in case I pass out? Pearce will surely know what to do. Oh, gosh this will be so embarassing if something happens to me right now in front of all of these people. Okay, Danielle, calm down ... And so I go back and forth trying my best to simultaneously watch the races and keep an eye on my blood sugars. As this is how it normally goes most of the time when I am left to guess if I gave myself the right amount of insulin.
Luckily last night everything worked out. I had probably guessed a little too much insulin, as my blood sugar was slightly low about 1 1/2 hours after I ate. I chewed on 2 sugar tablets and I was good to go the rest of the night and headed to bed around 11:00pm with a blood sugar of 114. Crisis averted ... this time. :-)
Going to things like this, in addition to having a husband who grew up eating out for meals a lot, I am constantly faced with the fear of having to guess how many carbohydrates are in a polish dog or nachos or beer, for example, that I am about to consume. The guessing can get REALLY tricky sometimes, leaving me with approximately 2 hours of anxiety following these guessing games.
Before each meal, I follow the routine of checking my blood sugar, counting the number of carbs I am going to consume, entering the information into my insulin pump, and then the insulin gets delivered into my body. Let the countdown begin ... For me, insulin works for about 2 hours in my body, meaning that 2 hours after an injection I can check my blood sugar again to find out if I've injected too much, too little, or just enough insulin for any given meal. If my blood sugar is low after those two hours it means I injected too much. If my blood sugar is high, it means I injected too little. You get the point ....
Well, after 13 years I can pretty much guess what my blood sugars are going to be and what they will do during those 2 hours for the foods I commonly eat. I try to stick to a pretty regular diet because of this. But the anxiety really kicks in when I am left to guess how many carbs are in a meal I don't usually eat. Going to restaurants can be a nightmare sometimes.
Last night at the supercross I ordered a polish dog and agreed to have some of my husband's nachos. Recently I had a hot dog at costco and thanks so my handy-dandy iphone app (Calorie King) I knew there were 35 carbs in the hot dog bun there. The polish dog last night looked a little bigger, so I guessed 40 carbs for that one and 20 carbs for the nachos (about 2 carbs per chip, meaning I knew I could only have 10 chips). Boy does this get exhausting!
Blood sugar check. Counting carbs done. Enter the information into my insulin pump ... begin delivering bolus (that's the term for a one-time insulin injection). I eat and then I wait. 2 hours of holding my Dex, watching which way my blood sugars will turn. Will they go up? How fast will my blood sugar rise? Did I give too much insulin? Is my blood sugar going to plummet? Oh gosh, where are my sugar pills? Do I know where the closest medic station is in case I pass out? Pearce will surely know what to do. Oh, gosh this will be so embarassing if something happens to me right now in front of all of these people. Okay, Danielle, calm down ... And so I go back and forth trying my best to simultaneously watch the races and keep an eye on my blood sugars. As this is how it normally goes most of the time when I am left to guess if I gave myself the right amount of insulin.
Luckily last night everything worked out. I had probably guessed a little too much insulin, as my blood sugar was slightly low about 1 1/2 hours after I ate. I chewed on 2 sugar tablets and I was good to go the rest of the night and headed to bed around 11:00pm with a blood sugar of 114. Crisis averted ... this time. :-)
Monday, February 6, 2012
Danielle's Diabetes Dictionary
Below are terms I commonly refer to, described in words that make sense to me :-) I hope this clarifies some things for y'all.
Blood Sugar: A number that tells me how much sugar is in my blood. A desired number falls between 80 and 120. It's not always perfect ... so please don't judge when it's high. Keeping it there is HARD WORK!And synthetic insulin isn't exactly like the real thing.
Insulin: A hormone produced by the pancreas that allows sugars to get from the blood stream into your cells so that they can have energy. Since my body no longer makes this hormone, I use synthetic insulin to do the job.
Carbohydrates: The enemy! haha Just kidding. Any carbohydrates that enter a body turn into sugar and end up in the blood stream. Without insulin, the amount of sugar in the blood stream would get too high and over time cause some major damage. Eek!
Low Blood Sugar: Anything under 60 to 70. I generally get a combination of disoriented, sweaty, tired, lethargic, low on energy, and hungry. I've heard that at 25 the brain doesn't get enough sugar and the body can start to shut down and cause unconsciousness, seizures, and a coma. Thankfully I've never been there. Phew!
High Blood Sugars: Anything over 140 is undesirable, although it's not uncommon to see blood sugars in the 200-300 range. The higher the blood sugar the more I feel tired, almost flu like, sick to my stomach, and irritable. It's easier to go high than low, and I've even heard of people seeing their blood sugar up to 1,000. My mom told me I was around 700 when I was diagnosed 13 years ago. Talk about an insulin drip straight to the vein, STAT! The long term affects (5-10 years of consistently high blood sugars) are what all those doctors warn you about. The occasional high happens. I treat it and move on.
Dexcom CGM (Continuous Glucose Monitor, aka "Dex"): A sensor I wear on my abdomen that transmits my blood sugar numbers to a wireless device that looks like an old fashioned cell phone. I love getting updates of my blood sugars every 5 minutes but best of all I can watch the trends in my blood sugars. I know when it's going up or down, and how fast it's rising or falling. This really helps keep me within that desirable range of blood sugars, and it's the one device I wouldn't want to live without these days. Meet Dex:
Omni Pod (aka Insulin Pump): This little pod attaches to my skin, carries insulin, and "injects" me daily with insulin. This wireless, portable, and easy to use machine has done WONDERS for my blood sugars, keeping them more stable than ever. It's probably the closest thing to a working pancreas on the market right now.
Type 1 diabetes: NOT CAUSED FROM EATING TOO MUCH SUGAR! Juvenile diabetes does have some genetic components, although these days most believe that it's caused by a virus that attacks your good pancreas cells, therefore ceasing insulin production in your body. The good news, there is only a 4% chance my children could get diabetes AND neither my parents nor I did anything to cause this diagnosis ... it just happens!
Endocrinologist: The doctor I see every 3-4 months who helps me with dosing and managing my insulin and blood sugars. Having a good one makes all the difference, and if you are in the San Diego area I highly recommend Dr. Einhorn and Chris Sadler. Chris' kind bedside manor, eagerness to be helpful, and knowledge of diabetes is outstanding.
Glaucoma, nerve damage, kidney failure, heart disease, etc.: Nothing for me to worry about ... Yes, these are the things that CAN happen if diabetes is not controlled but being in control pretty much guarantees me a long, happy life without having to worry. I get checked regularly for any concerns, but I have met many women who are living proof that what I am doing now is going to benefit me in the long run. No worries here :-)
Sense of humor: Something I wish I had more of when it comes to diabetes but also something I have learned is good to have when dealing with a chronic disease. Some days are good and some not so good. But hey, it's nice not to be so serious all the time. :-)
Blood Sugar: A number that tells me how much sugar is in my blood. A desired number falls between 80 and 120. It's not always perfect ... so please don't judge when it's high. Keeping it there is HARD WORK!And synthetic insulin isn't exactly like the real thing.
Insulin: A hormone produced by the pancreas that allows sugars to get from the blood stream into your cells so that they can have energy. Since my body no longer makes this hormone, I use synthetic insulin to do the job.
Carbohydrates: The enemy! haha Just kidding. Any carbohydrates that enter a body turn into sugar and end up in the blood stream. Without insulin, the amount of sugar in the blood stream would get too high and over time cause some major damage. Eek!
Low Blood Sugar: Anything under 60 to 70. I generally get a combination of disoriented, sweaty, tired, lethargic, low on energy, and hungry. I've heard that at 25 the brain doesn't get enough sugar and the body can start to shut down and cause unconsciousness, seizures, and a coma. Thankfully I've never been there. Phew!
High Blood Sugars: Anything over 140 is undesirable, although it's not uncommon to see blood sugars in the 200-300 range. The higher the blood sugar the more I feel tired, almost flu like, sick to my stomach, and irritable. It's easier to go high than low, and I've even heard of people seeing their blood sugar up to 1,000. My mom told me I was around 700 when I was diagnosed 13 years ago. Talk about an insulin drip straight to the vein, STAT! The long term affects (5-10 years of consistently high blood sugars) are what all those doctors warn you about. The occasional high happens. I treat it and move on.
Dexcom CGM (Continuous Glucose Monitor, aka "Dex"): A sensor I wear on my abdomen that transmits my blood sugar numbers to a wireless device that looks like an old fashioned cell phone. I love getting updates of my blood sugars every 5 minutes but best of all I can watch the trends in my blood sugars. I know when it's going up or down, and how fast it's rising or falling. This really helps keep me within that desirable range of blood sugars, and it's the one device I wouldn't want to live without these days. Meet Dex:
Omni Pod (aka Insulin Pump): This little pod attaches to my skin, carries insulin, and "injects" me daily with insulin. This wireless, portable, and easy to use machine has done WONDERS for my blood sugars, keeping them more stable than ever. It's probably the closest thing to a working pancreas on the market right now.
Type 1 diabetes: NOT CAUSED FROM EATING TOO MUCH SUGAR! Juvenile diabetes does have some genetic components, although these days most believe that it's caused by a virus that attacks your good pancreas cells, therefore ceasing insulin production in your body. The good news, there is only a 4% chance my children could get diabetes AND neither my parents nor I did anything to cause this diagnosis ... it just happens!
Endocrinologist: The doctor I see every 3-4 months who helps me with dosing and managing my insulin and blood sugars. Having a good one makes all the difference, and if you are in the San Diego area I highly recommend Dr. Einhorn and Chris Sadler. Chris' kind bedside manor, eagerness to be helpful, and knowledge of diabetes is outstanding.
Glaucoma, nerve damage, kidney failure, heart disease, etc.: Nothing for me to worry about ... Yes, these are the things that CAN happen if diabetes is not controlled but being in control pretty much guarantees me a long, happy life without having to worry. I get checked regularly for any concerns, but I have met many women who are living proof that what I am doing now is going to benefit me in the long run. No worries here :-)
Sense of humor: Something I wish I had more of when it comes to diabetes but also something I have learned is good to have when dealing with a chronic disease. Some days are good and some not so good. But hey, it's nice not to be so serious all the time. :-)
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Pity VS Empathy
I talk a lot about support in my blog posts. I am continually appreciative of the "support team" around me and for what each of these people do in my life. From people like my husband, parents, and family to the great doctors I have to the many acquaintances in my daily life that know about my diabetes. They all play a very critical role, from small to large, in my every day and long term management of the emotional and physical needs of being a type 1 diabetic.
Support comes in various forms. In my life support is medical. Support is physical. Support is emotional. And support is on-going ... to name a few. As someone who receives a lot of support I also tend to be very "picky" when it comes to which types of support feel genuinely supportive and which types I am sure are meant to be genuine but end up feeling like pity.
Sure, there are times in my life where I wish this would all go away. In no way would I wish the things I have to deal with on a daily and long term basis on anyone. There are days when this battle of blood sugars feels unending, wounding, and exhausting. It takes it's toll on my body both physically and mentally. And I am sure it also takes it's toll on those around me who can't go through what I am feeling but can only try to understand as best they can.
When I write or tell of these things that just truly suck, thank you for the times that you have praised me for my strength. Thank you for the times that you have helped with the financial burden of this all. Thank you for the times that you have let me cry. Thank you for the times you have celebrated great blood sugars. And thank you for being my rock when I am scared, anxious, or angry. I am not looking for pity, yet I thank you all for understanding that this is hard ... yet not impossible.
Support comes in various forms. In my life support is medical. Support is physical. Support is emotional. And support is on-going ... to name a few. As someone who receives a lot of support I also tend to be very "picky" when it comes to which types of support feel genuinely supportive and which types I am sure are meant to be genuine but end up feeling like pity.
Sure, there are times in my life where I wish this would all go away. In no way would I wish the things I have to deal with on a daily and long term basis on anyone. There are days when this battle of blood sugars feels unending, wounding, and exhausting. It takes it's toll on my body both physically and mentally. And I am sure it also takes it's toll on those around me who can't go through what I am feeling but can only try to understand as best they can.
When I write or tell of these things that just truly suck, thank you for the times that you have praised me for my strength. Thank you for the times that you have helped with the financial burden of this all. Thank you for the times that you have let me cry. Thank you for the times you have celebrated great blood sugars. And thank you for being my rock when I am scared, anxious, or angry. I am not looking for pity, yet I thank you all for understanding that this is hard ... yet not impossible.
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